The month of October is a great time to explore sexual fantasies and taboos. Not only is it National Kink Month, it culminates with the kinkiest of all holidays, Halloween. This month long festival of fright is jam packed with parties and events that encourage us to be someone other than ourselves and do things we wouldn’t normally dare. Why not take that sentiment to the bedroom and let that Halloween creativity inspire you explore some sexy taboos?
Sexual taboos are different for everyone. We all have things we absolutely won’t do, however, most of us also have a few naughty, unmentionable, totally hot taboos that really turn us on. These are the things we’ve been itching to try but because they are a little *ehemm* different or may seem too awkward to bring up to a partner. Halloween can be the perfect time and serve as the perfect excuse to dive into some of these unchartered waters. Here are 4 sexy taboos that you can explore this October:
1. Public Play
Does the thought of getting your rocks off secretly in a crowded space rev your engine? Halloween is the perfect time to take the plunge and try it out. Now, I would never advocate any sort of public sex where you may nonconsensually expose other people to things they don’t want to see, but there are certainly ways around that! October is jam packed with parties and events. The height of a wild Halloween party can be the ideal time to try out some secret fun.
Imagine spending an evening with the vibrating end of a powerful remote control vibrator in the pants of your Halloween costume and the wireless remote control in your lovers pocket. Or what if you ever so seductively demanded your partner wear a silicone butt plug during a rockin’ All Hallow’s Eve event? If you’re afraid the look on your face may give away your secret, wear a costume that includes a ornate masquerade mask to hide your delight from fellow party-goers.
2. Gender Bending
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to put on the clothes and assume the role of another gender? Many of us have but it’s something we rarely talk about because it’s considered somewhat taboo. This is especially true when it’s a man curious about wearing women’s clothing or assuming a feminine role in a roleplay scenario.
Since Halloween gives us the opportunity to express ourselves in ways we wouldn’t normally the other 364 days of the year, why not dress expressing gender very differently than your normal day-to-day? Whether you dress this way for halloween events or simply play around at home trying on different outfits in the costume chest, it can be fun to explore.
I had a male partner who dressed as a woman once for Halloween. I was surprised that I found it a turn on and, as the evening went on, I realized he enjoyed it too. It was something neither of us was expecting to feel but once we arrived home after the party, things got very steamy. Had this been the middle of April, neither of us would have dared bring up gender play, it was too taboo at the time for us. Exploring gender role play at Halloween seemed all in good fun and allowed us to try something daring we never would have dreamed of otherwise.
3. Fear Play
At Halloween we love to be frightened and surprised, just look at how long the lines are outside haunted houses. But why do we enjoy it? Isn’t being scared a negative thing? Well, not necessarily. When we’re frightened in a controlled environment like in a haunted house, at a scary movie, or on a roller coaster, we reap the pleasurable benefits of adrenaline and endorphins while still knowing in the end everything will be a-okay.
Guess what else gets adrenaline pumping, endorphins flowing, and triggers other similar physiological responses as fear? Sex. This is precisely why some people engage in BDSM play that uses fear for arousal. If fear play is something you’ve never tried before, Halloween may be the perfect time to experiment with your dark and spooky side.
Don’t dive right in and use your deepest, darkest phobia as a basis for your scary role play, most of us don’t find true phobias sexy. Opt instead for something that is just moderately creepy to you. Maybe for you that’s clowns, zombies, monsters, or vampires. Makeup and accessories for these kinds of get-ups are plentiful in October. (You can read more about our interest in clown play here and listen to our Sex Nerd Sandra clown play podcast here! )
Imagine a sex scene that includes your vampire partner tying you down with restraints and seductively sucking blood from various parts of your body. Or a ravenous monster inspecting every inch of you and using your body for their own twisted pleasure. This kind of dominant/submissive role play can be exceptionally hot but is a far cry from more common doctor/nurse or naughty schoolgirl/strict teacher scenarios you might think up during the other months of the year.
4. Animal Role Play
Imagine being adored, pampered, and fawned over. The love you give and receive is unconditional. Even when you are being naughty, you can truly do no wrong in the eyes of the one who loves you. You have no responsibilities and live in the moment. And of course you crave pleasure, usually in the form of touch, which you receive in unlimited supply. If this sounds like the ideal set-up to you, you just might enjoy role playing as a puppy, cat, pony, or even a cute little piggy.
There are many people that consider pet play the most satisfying types of role play to engage in. One of the most appealing aspects of role play in general is the mental vacation it allows us to take. This is a time when it’s okay to forget about our responsibilities, the daily grind, and let our mind wander elsewhere. Many attest that becoming non-human and not being bound by verbal language lets them most easily adapt to fully losing themselves in the moment. Wearing an animal mask like this or this can help you get into character quickly.
Some people also enjoy the “training” aspect of animal play. Existing as a pet who is punished and rewarded for their actions really allows the dominant and submissive aspects of this type of role play to be emphasized. You can creatively employ a collar and leash set or a bar gag to enhance this type of scene.
All of us have certain taboos that turn us on. Most of the time, however, we don’t express these forbidden fantasies to our partners for fear of seeming weird. Other times we don’t even realize certain scenarios turn us on until we accidentally stumble into them. Halloween may be the only time of year we’re comfortable enough taking our role plays to extremes and trying something truly different.
So when you get home from that halloween party next weekend, don’t take off the vampire teeth or cat ears right away. Snuggle close to your partner and see where it takes you. You may just be delightfully surprised to discover what seemingly sinister or silly things turn you on.